I think my toilet seat broke my toes

Read the title again slowly. I know what you are thinking. You are thinking that I have too many words in there and they are in the wrong order. How many of you want to reach for that red pen/pencil to correct what you think is my grammatical error? Logically the title should be "I broke my toes on the toilet." Although I guess that would need something else as well since it could also mean I was on the toilet and broke my toes which wasn't the case. Well, this is me and if you remember from a few entries ago, my friend commented that my brain is odd and my mom agrees, so I'm letting the title stand. It's accurate so deal with it. I'm not sure what a broken toe feels like or even multiple broken toes but I imagine they feel something like what I am experiencing. Okay, okay, I know you are dying to know the story of how my toilet seat allegedly broke my toes.

I had just gotten out of the shower and was drying off when Einstein (boy cat) is just outside the door meowing hello really loud. I don't want him to wake sleeping beauty in the next room so I quickly open the door and let him into the bathroom with me. He began whining really loud and I was trying to dress in a hurry so I could open the bathroom door and let him out before my son had to get in the shower. I lifted my foot really quickly and awkwardly since Einstein was in my way. The next thing I know I caught my three middle toes on the toilet seat, yes SEAT, and lifted it up a good 6 inches, which of course comes crashing down and freaks out the cat who opens the door and goes running into sleeping beauty's room. So much for being quiet. Toilet seats do not fall quietly. I didn't kick the toilet or bump my toes on the bowl, I just caught my toes on the seat. Odd? Uh, definitely! Of all the people you know, would it of course happen to me...Uh, definitely! Am I just a little confused at how I could catch my smaller inner toes only on the seat of the toilet and lift it while trying to put my pajama pants on and not fall on my cat, I'm being a bit repetitive here, but...Uh definitely! I have also come to the conclusion that feet are the most awkward appendage. Oooohh, now that I said that I wonder if they are an appendage or an appendage of an appendage? That seals it, feet are so awkward there isn't even a classification for them! They are just - feet. Feet are awkward. If it weren't for the whole standing up and using them to get around, I don't think I would like my feet. They constantly get stepped on, they trip me, they fall asleep and get all tingly when I sit on them, they get tired after using them too much, and sometimes they get owies. They get stinky, and they get hard spots you may have to scrub away with a stone, they grow bumps called bunions (even the name sounds icky) and they just stick out there so you are constantly kicking things. In my opinion feet are the most inconvenient appendage of an appendage. So glad I don't have four of them.